A True Shabbat Experience (Almost)

6.28.14 

I nearly passed out at the Kotel yesterday, but not for the spiritual reasons you might expect. Of course, when I pressed my hand to the ancient walls, closed my eyes and said the Shema, I felt the raw energy of thousands of years of blood and history flow into my body. I started walking backwards when I felt like I had taken in enough of the Wall for the moment, and after about 10 steps my head started to pound. I felt woozy, and my long skirt was wrapping around my thighs like a boa constrictor. In front of the holiest landmark of the Jewish people, I nearly passed out and fell flat on my back.

Let's backtrack. I started the trip running on about 4.5 hours of sleep after waking up early for a 6:30 am flight. Then I embarked on about 25 hours of flying and airport time, and barely slept on those flights. I managed to get some good shut eye on Monday and Tuesday night, but Wednesday was rough. Thursday was even worse-- my roommate Sydney's bed broke as she was sleeping on it, and as the frame become more and more of a pronounced "V" shape, our giggles grew into roaring laughs. Needless to say, I didn't need to have done the ab workout I had done 5 hours prior. We laughed for around 2 hours straight, and then were kept awake by the various birthright groups stomping in the hallway. 

Obviously, I was the definition of a hot mess on Friday. So by the time our evening at the Kotel came, I hadn't eaten for 6 hours, I was dehydrated, and I was exhausted beyond exhausted. The long cotton skirt and sleeved shirt I was wearing weren't helping, and my throat was starting to hurt. This tapestry of factors wove together and created the Lily that could barely walk up the hills of the Jewish Quarter. There's something you should know about me-- I don't know my limits. I tend to push myself, and after I had a bottle of water about midway through the walk, I thought I was fine to continue. After another thirty minutes of hell we made it back to he hotel. I ate about a teaspoon of rice, and promptly fell asleep upon arriving to my room.

I find it interesting that I was so sick when we visited the holiest place we had seen yet. It forced me to sleep for nearly 14 hours, and to actually take care of myself on Shabbat today. I've never actually followed Shabbat, and while I definitely used my phone and turned on lights, we spent all day resting in the hotel. It felt different, in a subtle way, but different nonetheless. After a powerful and hot experience at the Kotel, I spent Shabbat in the holiest city in the world-- and I actually took care of my tired body and followed the commandment to rest. It wasn't reaching nirvana, but it was some kind of enlightenment.